a reminder that we need allies

Today I had a rare opportunity to chat with a co-worker about our similar approach to work and the challenges we both face. I was surprised to realize how much I needed allies — more than I had previously understood.

I’m not even hiding my weaknesses or vulnerabilities; I’m just really good at not showing them at work. Navigating the workplace can feel like walking a narrow path. In recent years, I’ve often been the one setting expectations for a small cohort of peers, which leaves me with fewer opportunities to express my own struggles. Of course, I’m privileged to have support systems — a strong circle of managers and mentors. But even with them, I naturally position myself as someone with a high caliber, someone who has things under control. It’s hard to loosen up, if ever.

That’s why meeting a co-worker with a similar background and interests felt so refreshing. Suddenly, I’m not the only person who cares about speech quality and style; I’m not the only odd one trying to do things differently; and I’m not the only person with unpopular opinions who happens to favor alternative solutions. Maybe I’m still the guy who approaches problems from unusual angles — but now I know I’m not alone, and that makes me happier.

From another perspective, maybe I simply haven’t opened up enough to others or given myself the chance to build more allies. Something to learn to change.